Today has been remarkable . . . not because of the weather, or anything out of the ordinary . . . no, it was remarkable because I finally recognized the Signs I was meant to see. Granted, it took two of them and almost an entire day, but I finally noticed.
Sign number one was early. I was watching the Today show and a young pregnant women was being interviewed. Mornings can be a little hairy, so I had one eye on the TV and one eye on the peanut butter sandwich I was crafting for school lunch. Something about the story, that I was vaguely listening to, peeked my interest and I surrendered the peanut butter.
The gist is this:
One evening, not sure when, this young pregnant women, and her husband of almost five years, were traveling in their car. Another car, coming in the opposite direction, swerved once into their lane, tried to compensate, only making matters worse, and finally crashed into this young women's car. The details surrounding the other car's driver and passengers were clear; teenagers, impaired from alcohol and drugs, were multitasking and lost control of the car. Two of the four or five passengers were killed. And the young women's car? Her husband evidently realized what was about to happen and swerved into the oncoming SUV, on his side. She feels as though this final unselfish act saved her and their unborn child. Her husband died at the scene. Had their car hit the oncoming SUV head-on, all three would have died.
Obviously, I don't have to explain why this story would tug at most caring people, even for a moment. For me, it was more than a tug. It moved me to tears. She was trying to tell me and everyone else listening, one critical thought . . . don't take anything for granted, tell your family, friends, those who you love and care about, how you feel as often as you can; hug them and show them how much they mean to you . . . She's so right! This was my first sign.
Sign number two came at the end of my day. My son was cranky after school, and we were in the middle of what has become our typical yin and yang about homework, his day, grades . . . I was not interested in excuses, I wanted results! He didn't feel good, which is how he usually copes with anything that makes him uncomfortable or unhappy. So we rode to his dentist appointment in strained silence. We were late, which was his fault, and I had to remind him of that fact as we were getting out of the car. Once he was escorted back to get his teeth cleaned, I sat in the waiting room, decompressing, answering emails on my phone, oblivious to the epiphany I was about to experience. Hold that thought . . .
At this point, I need to offer a little bit of background. In the late 1980's, early 90's, one of my favorite musical artists was a guy named Richard Marx. He had a few albums that were popular. My three favorite songs of his, which also reminded me of my then fiance, soon to be husband (1993) were Right Here Waiting, Now and Forever and Hold On To The Night. Every time I hear any one of these songs, I'm back in the early 90's with my husband, living happily ever after . . .
Back to the epiphany: So, I'm sitting there, waiting on my son, feeling anxious and tense (which incidentally is not on my nTouchb450 list, quite the opposite actually) and then Now and Forever begins to play over the Mu sac system. And it hits me, thanks to this second sign . . . I'm missing the point of this day, and yesterday and maybe tomorrow if I'm not careful. The young woman on the Today show talked to me about it, Richard Marx was now singing it to me loud and clear . . . What are you waiting for, an engraved invitation to live and be grateful for ALL you have . . . what more do you need to be HAPPY? I was sitting, practically in tears in the dentist's office and I absolutely couldn't wait to hug my son, tell him how proud I am of him and how much I love him, NOT TAKE HIM OR ANYTHING ELSE FOR GRANTED, because that is exactly what I was doing. Taking it all for granted. Happiness and peace come from within, not from all the gadgets or nDulgences we all live with. There are NO GUARANTEES ever! We wake up, we walk through our day, we go to sleep and we start all over again the next day, if we are lucky! I better than anyone knows that; shame on me for forgetting.
Now as you might imagine, my son, who is only 15 and not as nTuned to these deep moments as his dear old Mom (plus he didn't share in this experience with me) was more than a little taken aback by my sudden and undeniable need to be close to him. He left "uptight, grouchy Mom" and came back to "everything is right with the world Mom." Okay, he looked at me like I had two heads at first, but eventually, he "walked the walk" with me. It's that ole apple falling not too far from the tree thing! He is after all, my son. I may bug him, but we are a team. We will always be a team.
Thank you, thank you, thank you . . . I'm feeling closer to me already :)
[In case you want to hear what my second sign sounded like, follow this handy dandy link, close your eyes and think of someone you love.]
http://ilike.myspacecdn.com/play#Richard+Marx:Now+And+Forever:37481:s502545.9631259.13311289.0.2.56%2Cstd_c660ae0af45644ac95c1cab39ef0699a
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