Day 20 - September 11th and the first game of the season

I will admit that it is hard to type or say September 11th without feeling a tug at my heart. Thankfully, this year, we had a wonderful distraction, the first game of the season. We left home this morning at 6:20. The five hour drive was uneventful, however, the peace and quiet gave me a lot of time to think about the history of events this day represents. This written journey is becoming something other than what I nTended it to be. I have already gotten distracted from time to time, and begun to write as if I have an audience, which I don't! This is supposed to be about reconnecting with me, nTouch with me before I turn 50. I begin again today!

September 11th . . . I was too young to remember the day JFK was shot and died. Although I do remember countless times throughout my life, grownups uttering the phrase, "do you remember where you were or what you were doing when JFK got shot?" The older I became, the more I realized how significant that day was to my parents and everyone else whose day stopped the moment they heard about their president. If you are my age or younger, you know what I'm describing. My youngest son, now 15, might feel the same way about 9/11. He was in kindergarten. His memories aren't his own, not really. Plus, for the first few years, I think the country was still in shock, so every anniversary it was as if it were happening all over again. The media replayed the day's events over and over, as if any of us needed the reminder. Now, nine years later, the pain isn't as intense, but all it would take was to watch original footage, and I would be back there again, that morning, glued to the TV, watching one horrible event after another unfold. The helpless, surreal moments that came together that morning will never leave me. I remember where I was, who I talked to, what I was doing the moments leading up to my phone ringing with the news, how scared and utterly broken I felt . . . raw was an emotion I had some experience feeling; that morning, I felt like I did the day my husband died, only worse. I didn't have anyone close to me die, but I knew a little bit about what all those people were feeling. Of course, I didn't really know, I just thought I did. I don't need to remind anyone old enough to share these sentiments how they felt that day, or for weeks and months and even years afterwards. None of us will ever forget September 11, 2001 or 9/11 . . .

Today, is a different day . . . today, I watched my oldest son, play football in their season opener, his senior year. He had a tremendous game, got defensive player of the game, and as far as I can tell, had a great day. Life truly does go on. That is the BLESSING . . . there will always be terrorists and bad guys and opportunists and danger . . . conversely, we must look beyond all the bad elements around us and stay focused on what is good. I know that sounds like dime-store psychology, but it is true. Our days, our relationships, our lives are largely what we make of them. I choose to be happy. That is really what this daily devotion to being nTouch with me is all about. I want to explore more of what I think and why I think the way I do . . . and I want to find peace and balance and certainly happiness, along the way.

Today's September 11th just might be the beginning of a new way to remember this day. Plus, it's Kimby and Mosen's birthday. Happy birthday!

Peace